16/12/13 part 2

Sitting here I feel alone and isolated. I have hardly eaten today. I can't face food, had some toast because then I've eaten.  Feel like such a failure at the moment.  Just don't know what to do any more.  Every day is harder than the one before. A few minutes ago I felt okish now I feel at rock bottom but dont know why.  I'm tired but know trying to sleep is a waste of time.  I think I have managed to push away all my friends and now I am so alone but yet the thought of spending time with people terrifies me too!  AAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!! It's all such a vicious circle.